Once upon a time there was a girl who always put her family first. She worked hard to make everyone around her happy. Her mom was the most important person in the world to this girl and she would do anything her mother told her to do even if the girl believed she would be happier doing something else. She took jobs her mom wanted her to, looked the way her mom thought she should, and had friends and boyfriends her mom thought she should. It's not to say the girl wasn't happy. She really believed making the people around her happy was all that mattered, so if they were happy so was she. This is the way life went until this girl was 24.
That was the year the girl's mother was diagnosed with colon cancer. Her parents said her mom would be OK. Her mom had surgery to remove it however the doctor said the cancer had gone through the wall and gotten into the lymph nodes. The doctor said he got it all and with chemotherapy her mom had a good chance of recovery. The girl at this point had gone to school for veterinary technology and in class had learned a little about cancer. She knew if it had gone into the lymph system it was only a matter of time and the diagnosis was terminal.
For three years her mother endured different types of chemotherapy. The girl watched as her mother struggled and tried everything she could to make her more comfortable. When the girl was 27 her mother was told she had a couple of weeks to live. The chemo had failed. The girl took care of her mom until she quietly passed away. She sat there holding her mother's hand not knowing what to do. For the last 3 years she had only thought of her mom and now her mom wasn't there and the girl felt lost. She thought she would never be happy again.
But this girl was blessed with a sister who she knew she could ask for help if she ever needed it. Her sister believed you have to make you happy before you can make someone else happy and you should live your life for you. The girl struggled with this logic. Over the next few years the girl tried to do things for herself but would still put other people's happiness before her own. The girl dated a man for a year she did not really love but thought if she could make him happy maybe she would be happy too but that was not the case and her sister's words came back to her.
When the girl was 29 her grandparents decided she should have a place of her own and bought her a small trailer and moved her in. The girl was happy there and was on her own for the first time in her life. No one to please, no mother, no boyfriend, just her. She still wanted to please her grandparents but found it easy and satisfying to think about how she could be happy. She went along like this for a while. She had a job she had worked hard for and loved. She talked to her sister who was very supportive and spent time with her grandparents. She felt she was happy.
When the girl was 30 she made plans to go wine tasting for her birthday with her sister, brother-in-law and her friend. She had also developed a friendship with a guy at the place she worked and invited him to come along. It was his birthday a day a part from hers and she thought it would be fun for them to celebrate together. The day turned out to be a lot of fun. The girl and boy had the same days off from work and one of those days happened to be Christmas day that year. The girl was going to go by herself to the coast for the day and hang out in the hot springs there. She asked the boy if he would like to come along. They had a good time and the girl really liked this boy. He was nice and easy to talk to. He was the first person apart from her sister, the girl felt relaxed with. She felt the person she was was good enough with this guy.
They continued to spend time together. Neither was able to bring themselves to label their relationship even though everyone else already had. For Valentine's day the boy came over with a bottle of wine, groceries and his guitar. He gave the girl a glass of wine and had her watch a movie while he baked her a cake from scratch and he played her a song on his guitar while it was in the oven. The girl had never had anyone do anything like that for her. They kept seeing each other for several more months. After about 10 months together the boy told her he had applied for a job in another state and was moving. The girl asked him not to but he already had accepted. He said he had to make this move for him to be happy and if he didn't take this chance he would always regret it. He asked the girl to go with him but she felt she could not leave. She had her family and her job and felt secure where she was and was afraid to leave. They decided they would try a long distance relationship and if after a couple of years they still wanted to be together the girl would move to be with him. The girl's family and friends said she was crazy and it would never work. Just let him go. But the more the girl thought about it the more she realized she would not be happy without him. The girl always believed God has a plan and everything happens for a reason. Even when her mother passed away the girl believed that God was going to send something wonderful her way. She started thinking maybe this was the person she was supposed to be with. What if this was the love of her life and God was telling her it was time for a change. Maybe the boy was right. If you are to afraid to take a chance and make a move you will never go anywhere. She talked to the boy about it and they decided to get married and she would go with him. They didn't have any money so the girl took some of her jewelry and sold it so they could by rings and pay for their marriage licence. She had never been to the place they would be moving to so they used the rest of the money and went to look for a place for them to live. The girl didn't have a job there but knew as long as they were together they would find a way to make things work. Everyone said they were crazy and real life didn't work that way.
They didn't care. The boy started his new job and a week later came back and got the girl. They got up at 2 am and left to start their new life together. They wouldn't know anyone and there were no guarantees it would work but the girl wasn't scared. She had complete faith that things would be fine as long as they were together.
For the first 3 days they stayed in a hotel with their dog and 2 cats until they could move into their apartment. It took a couple of weeks but the girl found a job. Money was tight but they were happy. After a month and a half they found out they were expecting a baby. They were surprised but happy as they had been talking about it. The girl still believed God had a plan and things would be fine. Her grandparents had sold her trailer and sent them the money so they could buy baby stuff. The boy got a promotion and they realized they were going to be OK. The girl and boy were very happy together and had fun spending time together talking about their baby and hopes and dreams for the future. They loved each other very much. They had a very good life. Everything was worth it.
I hope you learn something from this story. The girl's sister was right. You need to make you happy before you can make anyone else happy. You deserve to be happy. The boy was right. You need to take chances or you will never grow and you will never get anywhere worth being.
Sometimes love finds you when you least expect it. Don't listen when people tell you something won't work. Just because they are too scared to do something doesn't make it impossible. God has a plan for you and if it is meant to be, life will help you work it out. It won't always be easy but most things worth while take some sacrifice. The end result will be worth it. Don't rush. Enjoy the journey and the people around you. You will be happy you did.
And mostly Benjamin, your parents love you.
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