How to make a Band-aid

I had a ruff day. I had taken the day off of work to sit for the vet tech test and I had been stressing it for months. Last time I missed it by 4. This time I missed it by 7! 7!!!! SERIOUSLY?!!! I was feeling really down and I was starving. I decided to make some scrambled eggs. They looked amazing! Best I ever made. Then, to the insane delight of my cats, I dropped the whole damn mess on the floor! That's right. I didn't even get a bite! I cleaned up the mess and went to lay down on the couch. I was promptly joined by furry ragamuffins. Bee got there first and curled up on my chest. Just as I was drifting off, Bee started dreaming and I was repeatedly kicked in the face. A purring cat will do wonders when you are feeling down so I let her stay. Around 5 I decided to make some cookies. I found a recipe for chocolate brandy drop cookies. I happened to have a whole bottle of brandy so I thought I'd give it a try. They turned out pretty good and had a good kick to them. I then decided to try a round of peanut butter cookies. They came out pretty good too. :) As I was cleaning up I cut the tip of my finger off. OMG! OUCH!!!! I got a paper towel and applied pressure and headed to the bathroom for a band-aid. I was bleeding bad. Blood was running down my hand and the only band-aid I could find was the size of my forehead! Why do I even have a band-aid that size?! That wasn't going to work. So being a resourceful person, I wrapped my finger in a giant wad of toilet paper and wrapped that in leopard print duct tape and went back to the kitchen for a glass of wine.